My bizarre dream...

I had to write this down.  I just had the scariest dream. I was in one of the training centre in USA. There were a lot of familiar faces of people I had work with and worked for the whole life. After half day training , as I was going for lunch, the alert emergency alarm rang and all of us were ushered to the field and to the bus that eventually brought us to an resort . The journey was so long and by the time we arrived it was night time. Every time an alarm rings,  I always assume it's a false alarm or a drill. This time it seems real. As we alight from the bus. I realised I did not bring a single thing with me. No id,  no mobile nothing as if I had left everything of my this life in the centre. The news we heard along the way was that there was actually a nuclear bomb attack and the whole centre is gone to pieces. I saw Lisa and I cried . I told her all my life is left with nothing now.  I am stateless and nameless.  The only person  I want to run to is Freddy. I am so afraid of unable to contact him. Am I having this dream due to my low life condition ? Everytime I am having fever I will have the most bizarre and scary dream. I hope this is a dream and remain a dream only. There are more to the dream I had but I could only recall the above.  The rest was so blurry I am not even sure of what it was ... weird ...

I am not sure how to describe this emptiness in me. It seems that he is still there but part of him does not want to include me in his struggle. Could this be him testing if I could really go through this with him ? I don't think so. He is probably too busy thinking bout me . He has his own emotions to handle, his whole life of things to sort out in case he becomes too weak to handle it later. This will be another test of my inner state to be stronger. I was about to sink a little when the call to work and get my arse out came in. The timing was so right that I am forced to leave the house made me feel better after running errands for the departure tomorrow.  It even made me hunger for food. I believe the mystic law really works in the most unusual way when one needed it the most . I just have to have constant believe in it.