Today is another journey to get used to not having him beside me when I would hope he will be there. I am going to see Dr.Ann for a biopsy. This is not the first time I have to go through this process.
He once promised me that if we ever need to go through any procedure be it big or small, we will have to be there for each other. He wants me to be there for him just like when he had to have his wisdom tooth removed at Q&M. That is when he made that vow to me. I promised him that I will be there when he wants me to. He will want to be there when I need to change my "parts" in 3 years time.
The journey to the hospital seems lonely although the bus is full of morning crowd going towards their respective destination. I really wish to have him holding my hand and telling me that it's OK and he will be there. I can only dream of it now. I need to be strong and not fall today coz I had managed to climb a few steps up from hell since Sunday. The choice to be happy and sad is up to me. To be victorious and win or to be defeated and fall in misery is also up to me. There is no in between happy and sad , or win and lose. I must constantly remind myself this.
It was not such a difficult to go through today's procedure. Dr.Ann assured me there is most benign as the patches are not visible and it's tiny. We will just have to wait for the result. The scale today still say 49 kgs. I need to find a way to start increasing my weight. It will b too risky if I am underweight and go for EBC in September.
Friends I had not spoken or contacted me started calling or texting me when I posted my path to recovery in FB. All wanted to know out of concern but I could not share and not ready. I just want to move on and heal. Those who know me was shocked that I had fallen to this devastated situation. I just want to get back up soon on my feet on my own and with support from my family and friends.
He once promised me that if we ever need to go through any procedure be it big or small, we will have to be there for each other. He wants me to be there for him just like when he had to have his wisdom tooth removed at Q&M. That is when he made that vow to me. I promised him that I will be there when he wants me to. He will want to be there when I need to change my "parts" in 3 years time.
The journey to the hospital seems lonely although the bus is full of morning crowd going towards their respective destination. I really wish to have him holding my hand and telling me that it's OK and he will be there. I can only dream of it now. I need to be strong and not fall today coz I had managed to climb a few steps up from hell since Sunday. The choice to be happy and sad is up to me. To be victorious and win or to be defeated and fall in misery is also up to me. There is no in between happy and sad , or win and lose. I must constantly remind myself this.
It was not such a difficult to go through today's procedure. Dr.Ann assured me there is most benign as the patches are not visible and it's tiny. We will just have to wait for the result. The scale today still say 49 kgs. I need to find a way to start increasing my weight. It will b too risky if I am underweight and go for EBC in September.
Friends I had not spoken or contacted me started calling or texting me when I posted my path to recovery in FB. All wanted to know out of concern but I could not share and not ready. I just want to move on and heal. Those who know me was shocked that I had fallen to this devastated situation. I just want to get back up soon on my feet on my own and with support from my family and friends.
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